Poem: Learn with every goodbye
Learn With Every Goodbye
– Veronica A Shoffstall / Jorge Luis Borges
After a while, you learn the subtle difference
and between holding a hand and chaining a soul,
And you learn that love doesn’t mean leaning
And company doesn’t mean security,
And you begin to learn that kisses aren’t contracts
And presents aren’t promises,
And you begin to accept your defeats
With the grace of a woman,
not the grief of a child,
And learn to build all your roads on today
Because tomorrow’s ground is too uncertain for plans,
And futures have a way of falling down in mid-flight
And after a while, you learn That even sunshine burns if you get too much.
So you plant your own garden
and decorate your own soul,
Instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers.
And you learn that you really can endure…
That you really are strong
And you really do have worth
And you learn
and learn…
With every goodbye, you learn.
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July 2nd, 2009 at 7:02 pm
©1971 Veronica Shoffstall is the poet who wrote this poet.
this is absolutely a copyrighted poem by a known poet and should have the proper credit. It’s a wonderful encouragement for anyone going through problems, for sure, but it IS important to give literary credit where due.
Please correct this post and remove “unknown.” Thanks.
July 2nd, 2009 at 11:12 pm
Thanks for the pointer Sandy, I have corrected the same.
@every1: I did mention the source of the poem, but unfortunately the source that I referred to didn’t have the author name. Lesson learnt, I shall verify next time…
October 4th, 2009 at 7:34 am
This is the most important piece of work, for me ever. After the loss of my wonderful daughter, I created a beautiful work of art as a tribute to her specialness, and decoratively bordered the art with the words “plant your own garden and decorate your own soul, instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers”. This beautiful poem has meant everything to me. Sincerely, Susan.
February 16th, 2010 at 2:13 pm
It’s a translation of a poem by spanish poet Jorge Luis Borges (1899 – 1986) called Y Uno Aprende (pop the text below into google translate and see what comes out if you don’t believe me). Shameless plagarism on the part of Ms. Shoffstall
Después de un tiempo,
uno aprende la sutil diferencia
entre sostener una mano
y encadenar un alma,
y uno aprende que el amor
no significa acostarse
y una compañía no significa seguridad
y uno empieza a aprender.
Que los besos no son contratos y los regalos no son promesas
y uno empieza a aceptar sus derrotas con la cabeza alta y los ojos abiertos y uno aprende a construir todos sus caminos en el hoy,
porque el terreno de mañana
es demasiado inseguro para planes…
y los futuros tienen una forma de caerse en la mitad.
Y después de un tiempo
uno aprende que si es demasiado,
hasta el calorcito del sol quema.
Así que uno planta su propio jardín
y decora su propia alma, en lugar
de esperar a que alguien le traiga flores. Y uno aprende que realmente puede aguantar, que uno realmente es fuerte,
que uno realmente vale, y uno aprende y aprende…
y con cada día uno aprende.
February 16th, 2010 at 6:26 pm
Thank you for that, although it’s the essence of the poem that really matters for me.
February 16th, 2010 at 9:19 pm
+1 Susan, its the essence of the poem that matters.
Though due credit is important. Inanna, thanks for the comment.
March 2nd, 2010 at 7:55 am
The credit should be given to the correct poet and should be revised to reflect Borges.
March 6th, 2010 at 6:10 am
Inanna & Jessica have it right- the poet labored, constructed the thoughts articulately and with artistry. The correct source should ALWAYS be credited! There is too much of this on the “misinformation”net, because there is no one to take responsibility! Triple check resources & then do it another 3 times. And then you might be close to correct.
May 11th, 2010 at 2:43 am
It’s a lovely poem and I think the point here is that it brings solace and some joy to every one who reads it. To whom the credit goes may be for another forum.
I’ve read this before but it was lovely to read it again. Thanks, Annkur, for the reminder.
September 9th, 2010 at 8:43 am
This poem is lovely but seems mired in controversy regarding the original poet. Some have attributed it to Judith Evans as well. I do wonder if someone can actually quote from a published work to authenticate it? Is it really is a Borges poem, with translation by Shoftstall, or it is being wrongly attributed to him in order to make it seem more important?
September 11th, 2010 at 1:28 am
Wish I had an answer Swati, its the wordings that attracted me. Being a writer myself, I recognize the need for correct attribution, but then there are times when its unclear. I can be with that. Thanks
September 12th, 2010 at 11:37 am
I know. But surely it needn’t be unclear. Borges is a well known poet – there must be books in the library which people have access to (I don’t). Shoftstall, in a google search, doesn’t throw up anything except this one poem. So the prima facie evidence points to her being a translator only – but that, sadly, is no proof.
September 12th, 2010 at 5:53 pm
Thanks Swati, have added both names above for now. That may not be the best I can do, but thats what I have chosen to do for now.
September 13th, 2010 at 10:25 am
I think its a good choice till things are clearer
October 17th, 2010 at 1:04 am
Found a way to contact Shofstall herself through a publisher a few years back (lost all the contact info, having moved, etc.) but she herself said she wrote it. I didn’t ask about the Spanish poem at that time because I didn’t know about it.
February 22nd, 2011 at 6:30 pm
This is a poem by Jorge Luis Borges translated word for word and I believe the credit should be given to him. Veronica Shoffstall is the poet who translated this poem.
Miss Shoffstall should give literary credit where it is due.
March 31st, 2011 at 11:35 pm
I fell in love with this poem maybe 20 years ago after I’d completed a disasterous marriage with an acrimonious divorce. It enlightened me of many of my confused conceptions of love and marriage. Now I tell my teenage daugher to embrace the honesty of the poem. I am delighted to learn that it is not anonymous any more!
May 18th, 2011 at 11:18 am
This is one of the best poems written, but not by these two! The author is unknown.
October 21st, 2011 at 4:24 am
My middle son sent this to me, through email, in 2001 when I was about to go on a date because he wanted to encourage me, he was 24 at the time. He past away in 2008, age 31, after fighting Leukemia for 21 months. I am so glad I kept that email, I now have it hanging in my hall. I love it- it has helped me in so many ways, then and every day since.